compassion, politicin', and why being anyone else but yourself is a horrible waste.

I've been leaning heavily on friends these past few weeks, and each therapeutic conversation that is held within our shared spaces circles around these same topics: the importance of compassion, how we grow, like seeds, from trauma and pain, and the importance of authenticity, and why it's always worth the risk. 
Since it was announced that Donald Trump was to be our country's president, every day has been a jagged pill to swallow. The weight of the world is undeniably heavy for millions of us whom are threatened by bigotry, hatred & war. I've thought about how we got here. A lot. How did this happen? I mean really? Short answer: We did this. The apolitical apathy and silente violence from the 48% that stayed at home that Tuesday, and, equally, the liberal elitists that are *no better* than the far right; constantly blaming everyone but ourselves. I've had so many open uncomfortable conversations about this, and have ultimately felt so much relief .  
It's a devastatingly exciting time to be alive. 
I'm making a point to become aware of my vicious, continuously attacking thought patterns (you know the ones. . . )
I am absolutely terrified that everyone is going to know that I'm a fake. Clueless! Completely clueless. I can't stand the thought of not being liked. Actually, anything less than admired doesn't sit well with me. I just want to be loved. 
But, as it turns out, there are people in this world that will dislike you simply because you do not dislike yourself.
There is absolutely *no way* that you can be in the spotlight and not be criticized. 
If I really want to make this happen for myself, I need to become more comfortable in my own SKIN. 
I am so tired of being sorry.
I'm not sorry.
I.
Am.
Just.
Tired.